Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
