Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
My bed smells like the plague
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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