I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
