My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
