were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
