I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Randomize
