I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
