he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
