i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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