; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
your room smells of hookers.
And success
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize