i would punch a child for taco bell
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
