I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Randomize
