The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
