She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
