To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
