I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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