The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Send help, water and tortillas.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
