Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
