actually, I'm a sock model
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Randomize
