Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Randomize
