what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
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