Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Randomize
