I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Randomize
