so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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