He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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