Where is the hickey?
the condom got lost in my hair
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I FOUND THE LEGS
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
