He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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