Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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