Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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