And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Randomize
