Your face is a jimmy john
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
