i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Buhtt sex?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
