shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
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