Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize