It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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