there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
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