ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize
