Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
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