I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
The feeling are messing with the penis
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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