shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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