i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
