Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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