just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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