He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
