I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
