drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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