We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
You're a waste of cheezeits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize