Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
