I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize