it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Randomize